This is my first-ever video blog! It's about loneliness and working from home and my new "personal brand," which is humanity. I felt super nervous about recording this, and editing it, and also uploading it -- but I did it!
I'm happy with the final product, and I hope to make more videos in the future about being a person and how no one has any idea what they're doing. If you like this video, click "like" on the YouTube page so that I get the message and continue to make these. Thanks for watching it!
Hi, I'm Maddy Myers! Welcome to the first episode of What's Going On, a show about how terrifying it is to be a human and how nobody is ever going to explain to you how to do anything.
[Title theme plays]
Hey. I'm Maddy Myers, Internet writer. I have an embarrassing job title. It's very hard to explain it to people at parties, which is why I don't go to parties! Ha!
So, I work from home, which means I spend a lot of time by myself. I try to spend less time by myself by scheduling breakfasts with other people. I'll drag myself out of bed, and then I'll drag myself to a breakfast, and I'll socialize for two hours, and then I'll come home and be like, "Time to get some work done!" But I always get more work done on the days when I don't have breakfast with people. Except I feel much lonelier on those days.
I have social anxiety, and if I talk to somebody for two hours, I'm unaware of how much that is taking out of me until afterward. I go home and I'm like, "oof, I'm so tired, I'm so exhausted from that."That's ridiculous, right? But unfortunately, that's how my brain is.
So how can I negotiate between the loneliness of working from home and the stress of hanging out with people? Having a video blog! [looks at finger] Got eyeliner on my finger. Hm.
Yeah, so, actually, this isn't going to work because it's not – it's actually really lonely!? I'm talking to a camera in my own living room, and it's definitely not a person, and it's super sad, and it feels sad and weird. So, we'll see how that goes.
Oh, internet. This isn't going to help people see me as a person, is it? They're still just going to see me as some sort of figurehead. Like, now I'm a talking head. I'm a figure-head now. [does high-pitched voice] Hello, I'm Maddy Myers and I'm here to tell you that I'm a human being! Believe it! [normal voice] Each one of us is a special snowflake and none of us can connect with one another in any meaningful way. Oh, god, I need to go to bed.